So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Randomize
