found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
