Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
