Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
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