I swear she didn't look like that last week.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I just blew my weed a kiss
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Randomize
