Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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