You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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