i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
This is the prime rib incident all over again
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Randomize
