Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
