never play flip cup with pint glasses
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize