I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
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She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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