"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
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