Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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