That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
