I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
