Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
I'm having to shit out rocks
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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