I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
there's paper in my vomit.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
