I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
