If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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