Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Randomize
