Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
