As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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