This is not my ceiling
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
