I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize