i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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