I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize