I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
