After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize
