My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
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