wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
