I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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