Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize