my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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