Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
