I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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