If you die in college, do you die in real life?
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
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