So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
