Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I got inside last night via doggy door
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
