Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Your penis caused this!
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
