Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
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