I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
