ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
