I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize