Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
