the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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