with your own penis?
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Randomize