I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
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