Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
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So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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