we have officially lost it.
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
