Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Randomize
